What Did I Do To Deserve This?
by GreyEyesGlaringAtShonda
Summary: Preston, in his hospital bed, learns about Derek and Meredith's new affair. Addison comes in to see him. What does he say or not say? What is he thinking?


**What Did I Do To Deserve This?**

by greyeyedgirl

A/N: Original plotline is by **yahtzee63**and this story is dedicated to him/her. General inspiration by them, but most of the story is mine...hope you enjoy... :D

Summary: Preston, in his hospital bed, learns about Derek and Meredith's new affair. Addison comes in to see him. What does he say or not say? What is he thinking?

note: this is a one-shot. ONE SHOT. Kay:D There isn't supposed to be some big conclusive blowout. It's speculation. Alright:P

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Cristina looked both ways as she crossed down the hallway, still donned in her eggplant-tinted prom dress, and she turned her head to make sure no one was behind her as she crossed past one of the hallways, heading to the stairs that lead to the tunnels under the hospital.

She was just turning her head back forwards when she bumped into, literally, her best friend, who was also looking behind her as she crept through the deadly-silent hospital.

"Oh! Mer! Uh-" Cristina paused, gasping for breath, her hair coming out of its low bun and curling around her shoulders from when she'd laid her head against Preston's stomach.

"Meredith? Are you okay?"

Meredith looked at her, blinking vaguely, as she pushed back her own hair that was rumpled in front of her face. She spoke hoarsely. "I--I...I'm fine. I'm great. How are you? How's Burke?"

Cristina closed her eyes, pushing away the strong hurricane that had whipped past her at the sound of his name. "We're fine. He's doing well. Why do you look like that? What happened?" Cristina looked scared for a moment. "Izzie? Did she do something? Is she oka-"

Meredith shook her head fiercely, squeezing her eyes shut. "Izzie's fine. I mean..." She stopped, taking a deep breath. She looked up and down the hallway, then started running down the stairs. Cristina frowned, then followed.

There was a long row of abandoned gurneys lining up the dark underground tunnel, and Meredith collapsed onto one of them, spreading her legs in front of her while leaning her head against the wall. Cristina looked at the hard beds, and stayed standing, the thought of the people in pain that had once occupied them suddenly making her sick.

"So what happened?" Cristina asked, her voice uncharacteristically soft. Meredith closed her eyes, her hair now sticking to her head in clumps.

"I don't know," Meredith whispered.

"It was all...so fast...and it doesn't feel like it's over. It doesn't feel like..." Meredith's breath caught, her body started to shake, and her face glowed red.

"What about---What about---"

Cristina stared at her concernedly. "Meredith?"

"What about me? What about Finn-Derek-I---my mcdreamy--my---" She started breathing harder, as she shook her head from side to side. "WHAT ABOUT ADDISON! WHAT DID SHE DO TO DESERVE THIS! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME! WHAT DID I---" Meredith closed her eyes, shaking, and Cristina stared at her in horror.

_"Meredith,"_ she breathed. Meredith cried harder, shaking her head, her face bright-red like an infant with colic.

Cristina watched her for a moment, and then for the second time that night she crawled onto a hospital bed with someone she loved, taking Meredith into her arms and pushing her sticky hair from in front of her face. She didn't know if she could deal with anymore tonight, she thought. She just didn't know if she was strong enough.

-o-

The light was fading into the hospital room through the window to the hallway, small shadows sinking in from the cracks in the blinds. Preston Burke let out a small yawn like a young child, hearing soft breathing next to him. He opened his eyes, holding back a smile at the sight of his girlfriend curled up next to him on the bed, her hair tumbling out onto his neck and curling around one of the tubes hooked up to him.

"Cristina," he murmured. She didn't stir, and he used his left arm to squeeze her slightly harder to him, smelling the soft scent of her perfume, her hair brushing against his face and letting him inhale her herbal shampoo.

"Cristina. Hey, time to wake up." He let his lips graze the side of her face. She readjusted her face, causing him to laugh when her hair tickled him, and she let out a soft moan, as she slowly opened her eyes.

"Oh," she said, looking around. "Sorry. I came back last night, I was just going to stay with you awhile but I guess I fell asleep."

Burke smiled, and she got a glimpse of his sparkly teeth from between his lips. "It's fine. You don't have to explain."

Cristina tried to smile, sitting up. She looked around warily, pushing her hair out of her face, and then taking the hair-tie from off of her wrist, loosely tying her hair back in its messy bun. Burke inspected her face carefully, then sighed.

"Are you alright?"

She turned to look at him. "I should be asking you that."

Burke shook his head. "What happened? Are you worried about Stevens?"

Cristina shook her head slowly. "No. Meredith said Alex was with her. He'll make sure she's alright."

Burke frowned. "So what is it? You look bothered. Last night you looked scared...but then I thought you were alright. Now you look...like something is worrying you, or disturbing you." He squinted. "I can't explain it. What's the matter?"

Cristina shook her head, trying to laugh it off. "What do you mean? I'm fine."

Burke looked at her for a few moments. She tried to avert her gaze, leaning back against him gently and looking down at the tile floor. "Cristina," he murmured. She closed her eyes.

"Meredith did a terrible thing."

Burke frowned as he buried his face in her hair. "With who?"

Cristina shook her head fiercely. "Three guesses."

Burke closed his eyes. "Let me try...um...first clue...he operated on me yesterday."

Cristina forced a weak smile. "You're getting warm."

"...he has a wife that is one of the most talented neonatal surgeons in the country..."

Cristina reached down to take one of his hands in hers. "You'll have to be a _little_ more specific, Burke..."

"...My girlfriend likes to refer to him as 'Dr. McDreamy...'"

Cristina frowned, sitting up. "I do not. Not for ages."

Burke looked into her eyes intently. "So Shepherd and Grey."

Cristina nodded silently, taking in his gaze. "Derek and Meredith."

Burke sighed, closing his eyes. Cristina layed back against his chest, wrapping her arm around him as she was careful not to disturb any of the tubes slipping into his skin.

-o-

Derek stood leaning against a nurse's station, his head in his hands. Meredith watched him from a distance, a stray strand of hair hanging her face, and she tentatively took a step forward.

"Hey. I've been looking for you."

Meredith stopped, watching Addison walk up to Derek, wrapping one arm around his waist casually and smiling up at him. "How's your day been going?"

Derek looked down at Addison, trying to smile, then looked past her to Meredith, where his breath caught.

"Fantastic," he breathed. Addison raised her eyebrows, smiling.

"Wow. I'm glad you're having a good day. How's Preston doing?"

Derek continued to look at Meredith absenmindedly, then jumped and looked back at Addi. "Oh...he's recovering, slowly, but recovering. I'm going to refer him to some physical therapy programs. He's having some trouble with his hand."

Addison watched him, looking heartbroken at this news. "Oh no. Oh, my god."

Derek looked back at Meredith. "Yeah," he said breathily.

Addison dipped her head, looking at the white linoleum sadly. "Maybe I'll go see him later. He could use some friends right now."

"Mmm," Derek said absentmindedly. "Yeah. Well, Cristina's been with him a lot. I don't think she worked today...the Chief gave her the day off, but still. I wouldn't think that's how she'd react, _not_ working. But she must realize that by Burke is where she needs to be."

Addison watched him sadly. "Yes. She's being very brave. It must be very difficult for her. For both of them."

Derek looked past her to Meredith, who was staring at him like a deer-in-the-headlights. Addison didn't seem to notice anything. "Yeah," Derek said. "It must be very difficult for both of them."

-o-

Addison Montgomery-Shepherd strolled down the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital, her long red hair bouncing on her shoulders. She flashed a smile at one of the passing interns, before knocking on one of the doors to a hospital room, then tentatively opening it. Burke looked at her inquisitively from the bed, as Cristina jumped up.

"Uhm...ah, erm...Burke, I have to go." Cristina smiled down at Burke, before squeezing his hand gently. "I'll be back later. I promised I'd do something for, uh...Izzie. I'll be back." She dropped his hand nervously, before anxiously pushing past Addison to the door, not meeting the attractive doctor's gaze.

"Hi, Preston," Addison said, smiling and coming into the room, taking note of the gift bags, candy boxes, flowers, and knick-knacks lined neatly around the room. She set down her own flowered pink bag next to a large bouquet, before seating herself in a nearby chair.

"How are you feeling?"

Burke smiled uncomfortably, moving his hand, which was still trembling, though not as much as it had been earlier, so it was hidden beneath the blanket. "I'm feeling well, Addison. Cristina's been with me the whole day." His voice broke when he said Cristina's name.

Burke looked at her carefully. "But what about you? How are you holding up?" _She looks calm, maybe even happy. Oh, god, she doesn't know._

Addison looked at him curiously. "I'm fine, actually. Why wouldn't I be?"

Burke made himself shrug innocently, forcing a smile. "There's been a lot going on. A lot of people here are pretty shook up. And what with treating the chief's niece, and...just, everything." He frowned as he finished. He sounded awkward and pathetic to his own ears.

Addison tried to smile, moving her hair so it all framed her face. "Yeah. It's been a difficult time here. But...everything will be fine eventually."

Burke felt extremely uncomfortable, watching her nervous, innocent smile. _She doesn't deserve that. He has to tell her. He---_

There was a small noise outside the door, before it swung open, revealing Derek Shepherd, who entered the room with his head down. He looked up, jumping at the sight of his wife.

"Addison!"

Addison turned to smile. "Hello, Derek."

Derek forced a weak grin, feeling his eyes tear up. "I didn't know you were in here. I thought you had a surgery?"

Addison nodded. "It's not for 20 minutes."

Derek licked his lips, smiling nervously. "Right. Well, um...Dr. Burke! How are you feeling?"

Burke glared at Derek. "I'm still..." he looked at Addison, then shook his head. "I'm still having the problem I told you about."

Derek looked sad. "I know. But, it's been getting better all day, and with the right physical therapy program-"

Burke cut him off, frownng. "Right." He turned to look at Addison, then back at Derek pointedly. Derek's small smile slowly slipped, as the realization washed over him.

"Ohhh," he breathed. Addison turned to look at him questioningly. Derek smiled at her. "Never mind," he said quietly to his wife, as Burke watched.

-o-

Ten minutes later, Addison exited Preston's hospital room, saying good-bye to her colleague five minutes after her husband had. It was getting late, Derek was headed back to the trailer, he'd said, but Addison had a late-night surgery on a young baby. She crossed down the hallway when the intern that had been on her case stopped her.

"Dr. Shepherd. Little Amy Rollins' surgery's been rescheduled, they needed the OR for an emergency...the operation is now tomorrow at 10:45 AM."

Addison stopped, nodding. "Oh, alright. Go talk to the parents, tell them I'll be in contact first thing tomorrow morning."

The intern nodded, before rushing off. Addison continued down the hallway, heading to the attendings' locker room where she could change out of her scrubs and go home.

-o-

Derek and Meredith caught each other's eye, watching each other from opposite sides of the hallway. It was Derek who made the first move, taking fast strides towards her, until he was only inches away, staring down into her grey eyes.

"Meredith..."

She looked up at him, her eyes tearing over. "We can't," she breathed. "You have a wife. A beautiful, kind wife who---"

Derek's eyes silenced her. "I'm still in love with you. Addison...being with Addison has never changed that."

Meredith watched him, before closing her eyes, but that only made her want to dream of him. "I----We----"

Derek looked down at her. "Addison has a late surgery. Come home with me."

Meredith looked at him tentatively, before allowing him to lead her to the exit.

-o-

Derek and Meredith entered the trailer fifteen minutes later, undressing themselves passionately as Derek led her to the bedroom.

-o-

Addison entered the trailer tiredly 45 minutes later, slipping off her jacket and brushing her hair out of her face, yawning as she headed towards her and Derek's bedroom, looking forward to cuddling up next to her husband.

-o-

Five miles away, at the entrance of Seattle Grace Hospital, the tall handsome plastic surgeon stepped out of his new Porsche, all his thoughts focused on getting the love of his life back. At that moment Alex Karev was heading back to work after finally getting Izzie taken care of, and leaving her in the company of her friend George for the night. Alex frowned, stopping in shock at the sign of the new doctor.

"Dr. Sloan!"

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hahaha...and that's the end... :D


End file.
